Fake it till you make it

So my road trip back home was a major success !!!1 The ride back was fun i blasted my music and was singing/rapping along just excited at the fact i was about to be home and see my friends and family. And let me tell you my weekend it was amazing i had so much with fun with Cierra and Ashley however i have this feeling something is off. i have set so many high goals for myself due to the fact i love proving people wrong and succeeding, and i feel like i have succeed in many areas but not even half the goals that i have set. And while i was out partying and having fun all i could focus on was everything that i have not yet done, and everything i have yet to prove. This weekend i have made good decisions, while i have made some ” What the fuck T’yanna ” choices however this weekend i and fun and i learned. I learned a lot like being pretty has its perks, you get into the vip for free, don’t have to pay to get in, also that servers at 3 am are the most rude people awake, also that i love to have a good time and just enjoy life, while still slaying what i have planned for my future. So it is okay to feel out of it people. It is okay not to be okay and feel confused and out of place and angry at the world. We get told so many times to let things go and ignore them when they eat us alive. But we can’t change the way we think over the course of a day. We are human we need time. Time to think about who we truly are vs who we want to be. What are we going to have to do to get from where we are to where we want to be. It all starts when you are ready to live. So i am on spring break i work all week and aim planning on how i am going to change and who i am going to keep in my life vs who i am going to cut out and never give the explanation why. Family or not toxic people are not needed in your life. cut them out. School is going to drag you through hell and it will be painful but trust me in the end you will be gladded you did it and finished it. Friend will stab you in the back and that is okay because they help you appreciate your real friends even more. It is okay to want a life for yourself when everybody thinks you need a totally different life. Nobody knows what you need but yourself. So love yourself and do what makes you happy and when life gets tough make a plan, write, and make a change.

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