Fall brings the past back in pieces and flashes. The weather gets cold, you are trapped in the house more especially if you live in the north due to the snow and the fact you can and will freeze. But the fall personally for me brings back  memories. I do not know what it is but i think of the past months of the current year, years and it makes me realize how fast time actually does go by.

Early childhood 

While at a football game last night I started to think back to when i was a little kid. I would watch movies about college and the football games and think , about how much i can not wait to be there and experience it for myself. I was such a i can’t wait child, and so eager to grow up and just get to the fun part of the life. which i believed were parties, becoming famous, just having everybody know me. I grew up just wanting to have fun and stay true to myself while still growing up. I had a lot of friends and wild dreams. I realized i had so much hope and dreams and mostly faith in people in the world. I was the typical child. i had believed in the good of the world only to have it change as time had passed. 

Teenage years

i would say my teenage years were from the ages of 13- 17 years old. simply because when you are 18 you are on your own, literally unless you are lucky to have your parents carry you through life but back to teenage years. I was a bitch. i was very narcissistic and only thought about myself and outcomes for myself. I went from wanting to be famous to somebody who just simply wanted to be done with school. Ever since i could remember i always hated school.

1. i do believe that grades do not define somebodys smartness, it is a semi good indicator but should not be a way we establish somebodys smartness.

2. i hated 6 am mornings, like hated it.

I could go on and on but you guys get the point. This period of my life i was trying to become who i wanted to be without knowing who i was. These years are the years everybody throws that stupid saying ” these are the best 4 years of your life” WRONG WRONG WRONG omg wrong. These are fun years yes but they are not the best. they are like the free trial before you buy the product. you experience perks here and there and only for a certain amount of time and then boom it is gone. because you are young, you are still under your parents authority, and your “friends” are only your friend simply due to the fact that they are their everyday monday-friday and you are barely anywhere else. These years i was just ready to be on my own and alone and that drove the people around me to be tense and frustrated and me to be pissed off 24/7. I think these years of life are the trial and errod years simply because you are in the gap where you have to figure out who it is you want to be. while still attemtpting to discover who it is that you actually are.these years were my trial before purhasing and i am glad my trial is over.



By far my most intense time of life, lord i have been dragged by my edges and well taken care of all at the same time. This is where you will have literally 12 dollars in your bank account and still manage to have a smile on your face while tears fall down your face. You have all the freedom in the world and that is the adventure part of the whole jounrey. you are alone like nobody is holding your and guiding you you are your own boss. and i am not going to go into much detail here because i just dabbled my feet into it a little bit it is fun, man is it fun. 

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