I just miss you, and it’s as simple as that. And it’s more the memories with you, I miss you. Life has been hell this past year, and I’m thankful I’m still here I’m just mad you’re not. When life would get bad I had you , and though you couldn’t really speak I still understood you and knew you could understand me. You had came into my life at a time where everything was new. I had moved into a new house new friends school family everything was foreign, then when we got you I found my first sense of what home was. You were bad and when I say bad I mean bad, you chewed shoes you would attack Athena you were just bad, but you were young. And I used to think you were out of control, but you were simply being a child, and i would pay any amount of money to have you back for just one day.
Middle school was was riot, I had went through the growing stages of puberty and body development, and while everyone was scared about what was coming of me and who I was becoming you seemed to pass no judgement and still view me as the same T’yanna, and that view kept like going when I look back. I would have amazing days and would come home and you would be happy to see me and I would be to see you and it was all good. Then I would have bad days where everything was going wrong and I felt
Alone but then you would come into my
Room and you just knew, and you would sit and just let me cry and hug you, never once did you not come and check on me, and that is when I discovered when I didn’t Have a sense of a home, it was you. You were my comfort Zone you were the place I went to when things I got really bad and you were the place I went to when things got really good, but the only bad thing with a home that had a heart is it eventually leaves and you’re left to find a new “home”.
Highschool you were way older now as was I, when I got you I was 7 now there I was 17 and you 11 and we had watched eachother grow up. I had watched you learn how to use the bathroom outside, how to fetch, how to sit and speak and lay down and never fully listen to stop begging. And you had watched me learn that Friendships end, people will lie to you, my rebellion in school and life, then you had watched me get it all together. You seen me off to prom, homecoming, then graduation, then me moving back to Michigan for school… or final send off. I remember the night before packing I had asked you ” do you think I’ll be okay” and you just put your head on my shoulder and I knew you had faith it would be okay and I’ll be fine, then the next morning I told
You goodbye and that I love you, then 4 months later you were gone.
I never got to say my final goodbye because when you left I was working, and it bothered me forever until last night, I was going crazy over this upcoming semester and money and just everything then I Remembered asking you ” do you think I’ll be okay” and you gave me the hug and I realized you never let me down or was wrong, whenever I would ask you things you’d either put your head on my
Shoulder or you’d just sit and stare like “you know the answer T’yanna”. And when life gets super shitty and when I watch people with there dogs I think of
You, you were my bestfriend and my first diary/journal. I told you everything and you would listen and I love you, and most importantly I miss you a little more everyday.